My heart was heavy as I was saying bye to my parents, wife and my lovely daughter Diya. I could see my wife in tears, we have never been separated for more than a week. This time it’s going to be 2 months trip and my first time outside India. I checked-in the bags and one of them was weighing around 28Kgs and so I had to do some shuffling, shifting. Since this was my first long trip, my wife loaded me with lot of snacks and groceries. I had to get rid of few things before I finally checked-in. I was sweating like hell in spite of the cold air inside the Airport. Then I got my boarding passes, waved a final bye once again and then entered the Emigration check.
Emigration Officer: "Sir, Your name please"
Flash back…
"My Name Wignesh (no not V -Vignesh, but W -Wignesh). I'm native Walajabad and my dream is go Washington DC." As I was introducing myself on the first day of my college, the whole classroom burst into laughter with my English.
Officer : (Bangs the table) Excuse me Sir, I asked your name?
Me : Oh Sorry its Wignesh - Wignesh Balasubramanian
Officer : (Looking at the passport and staring at me) Where are you going?
Me : US
Officer : Purpose of Visit?
Me : It’s for a Software Requirement Study
Officer : (Stamps a seal on the passport and gives it back to me)
Me : Thank you
Everything was new to me since this was first time. I had to enter the security check. I was struggling a bit and just followed whatever others were doing, putting the handbags for screening, entering the metal detector, standing up with raised arms on the sides. Once it was over, I was wandering around the airport for sometime, until I found the Gate 23. I went there and took a corner seat. I still had about an hour and a half for the Departure.
As I sat there, my memories started to rewind back. I was 15 when I first heard about Washington. I used to play with the Street Friends, there were couple of them, but Naveen was different. He was rich, really rich; his father was doing many businesses. Unlike his family we were just middle class, I should say lower middle class. My father was working as a lab assistant in the SIVET College. Though we had an own house, it was very small. One day after playing Naveen called me to his house, initially I was reluctant since my father would scold me but then he caught my hands and pulled me to his house. The moment I entered, I was dumb stuck. They had a very big house, huge garden like a park, nice sofa and big TV. We never had TV at home and I couldn’t take my eyes of the TV. He was telling a lot of stories about his family, father, and house. He told me that he has an uncle in America, Washington DC. At that moment, seeing this big house and hearing the news about Washington, it got deep inside me. I wanted to see how Washington would be. A dream started to develop within me. This part of my life was called "Dreaming"
Hey Wignesh, (someone tapped me from behind) - how are you?
Me : Hey Deva, What a surprise I'm good, how are you?
Deva : Good, Good. After long time right, so where are you working?
Me : I'm working in a company called Fourthware Technology Solutions as a Sr Programmer... And you are with, CTS right?
Deva : That was 2 years back, now I'm a Delivery Manager in Accenture.
Me : Oh is it?
Deva : Yep. So finally you got a chance to go abroad is it, fantastic. Where are you going?
Me : Yeah, I did (I was telling inside my mind - I bet you thought I would never travel onsite). I’m going to New York and then Washington. And You?
Deva : Wow, cool. I'm going to South Africa.
We had a chat for about 10 minutes and then he had to leave for his flight. Devanathan was my MCA colleague in S.I.V.E.T College (SOUTH INDIA VANIAR EDUCATION TRUST). All of my MCA colleagues are well settled in high post, few of them probably Directors by now. My story was different. I first touched computer only in MCA. I wouldn’t have even taken MCA if it was not for my professor Ramalingam.
I studied in Tamil Medium till 12th and got BSc Physics seat in SIVET through our Vaniar caste quota. It was very hard for me, Learning everything in Tamil for 14 years and suddenly shifting to English medium. Though we had a separate subject English in school, neither was it taught to us well nor did we study it good. I still remember the first day of my college. I entered the college wearing a normal old shirt, tucked out, simple trouser and just slipper. My hair was oiled well, nicely combed, with vibuthi on the forehead looking like a typical “Gnana Pazham”. That’s how people like me are called. He asked each one of them to introduce themselves and what was their goal in life. I was so nervous about talking in English and when my turn came, this is what I said "My Name Wignesh (no not V -Vignesh, but W -Wignesh). I'm native Walajabad and my dream is go Washington DC." The whole classroom burst into laughter with my English. After the personal introduction, Ramalingam sir started the first day with some topics on Dynamics. I didn’t understand a bit of word. There were many simple words which I couldn’t understand. I was totally blind, everything was Greek and Latin. Probably I should say everything was English, after all english was greek and latin for me. After the class he called me separately and asked what I understood. I nodded my head left-right. Then he asked if I was from the Tamil medium. I said yes. Then he gave me some notes as a short summary of what he took that day. He asked me to study only that which should help me clearing the subject. You won’t believe that he gave me these notes every single day for the whole year. This not only helped me to understand the subject easily but also improved my English. My father was working in the same college and we used to travel together by cycle and then train. It took 2 hours to reach college, and when sometimes (probably should say it many times) students would strike they would declare it a holiday. However I had to wait for my father till the evening. I utilized that time to sit in the college ground for studying. I studied a lot, I learnt English, worked really hard. This part of my life was called "Learning English"
"May I have your attention please, Ladies and Gentleman this is the final announcement for Flight No QR 277 Chennai to Doha is ready for Boarding at Gate 23".
I was disturbed by the Flight Announcement. The Flight was from Chennai to Doha and then Doha to JFK, NY. It was a connecting flight and it was a direct check in, so I just needed to collect my checked-in baggages in NY. There was a meeting for 1 week in NY and then the rest of it in Washington. Took my handbag and backpack, gave the boarding pass to the officer and stepped into the Flight for the first time. As I was entering, the Air hostess was asking my boarding pass to check the seat no and guided me the path. I asked the check in officer especially for a window seat since this my first travel and was waiting to see the take off. My Seat was 35 A, near the rear of the flight. I was looking on the numbers as I walked, finally found the seat, kept my bags on the top deck. Sat on the window seat and then took a deep breath. It was a four hour flight to Doha, then a transit for 1.30 hrs and then another 14 hours from Doha to NY. “Huh! It’s really a long journey”, I was telling to myself. The captain announced that there is going to be some delay due to air traffic but will make up the time in the air.
As I rested, my mind went again to the flash back. From the 2nd year I was able to write at the speed of professor's dictation and so didn’t take the short notes from him. At the end of 3 years, I scored 71% and was college topper. It was that time MCA course was introduced and professor Ramalingam looking at my marks spoke to my father to get me a MCA seat. The course fee was 10,000 per semester and my father said he cannot afford it. Ramalingam sir somehow convinced my father saying that I might get 50% scholarship from the college. My father was very stingy but he had no other option since he had to save each and every penny he earned. One thing which I didn’t like was that he used to tell me everyday about spending so much for me for MCA.
Thanks to Ramalingam Sir, that’s how I joined MCA in the same college. It’s been 13 years now since I finished MCA but whenever I meet him, he says he is very proud of me and quotes me as an example to all the students. An example of how a student from a Tamil medium can make it to the top of the class. I was honored by his words and felt so happy that I have saved his name for the trust he had with me.
The Air hostess came around and gave some candies. Then they started explaining the safety measures in the flight. After an hour delay, the flight started to take off. I was just peeping through the window to see the flight moving slowly to runway. Then after few minutes, it started to move with full speed and just took off. It was awesome!!! As it climbed and tilted a bit, I could see the Chennai airport, the buildings all becoming tiny little just like a circuit board. Once the flight reached a height, the seat belt sign was switched off. They started serving breakfast and I asked for a vegetarian meal. As I switched on the mini TV screen in front, it reminded me the first day in MCA when I learnt to switch on the computer
Yes! I saw this machine called “Computer” for the first time in my life and I didn’t even know how to switch it on, When most of the guys in the class were already programmers by that time. I was sitting in front of the computer blinking at it for a while when one of the lecturer came and switched it on for me. That’s when I knew how to switch it on. Most of them in the class had done BSc Computer Science and were aware of most of the subjects. Exams were like a cake walk for them since the syllabus was almost the same like their bachelor’s degree. But I had to start it from the beginning. I was still wearing simple old clothes and slippers while the others were all modern youth with stylish t-shirts and rich English. They all looked at me like an insect in the class. It was very painful for me to get along. It took some time and people slowly started moving with me but they were still much advanced practically while I was still reading the theories. I wanted to prove something to these guys, that I’m better than them in someway. At the end of MCA, everyone had at least one arrear in the 3 years except me and that was one thing I could add to my collar. This part of my life was called “Learning Computer”
I remember only switching on the mini TV but had fallen asleep due to tiredness. I was woken up by the announcement again saying that we will be reaching Doha in another 30 minutes. I went to the restroom to fresh up and there was already a queue. After freshening up, came back to seat and in few minutes the flight landed in Doha. After getting down, we realized that the delay was not covered up and so we had missed the connecting flight. Qatar airways said they will arrange an alternative and asked us to be patient. After sometime, they said they have arranged an alternative flight Doha to London through Qatar Airways and then London to JFK through British Airways. However that flight was after 5 hours. We had no choice other than to wait for it. They did arrange for a compliment breakfast in the Airport. I happen to meet couple of Indian people who were also travelling to US. A father and her 5 yr old daughter who was permanent resident in the US, was travelling back after a vacation. Two young guys from CTS just like me but travelling on a L1 visa. There was a lady who was bit restless since her husband was suppose to pick her up in Texas and she already change 2 flights. There was an old couple, parents going to US for their daughter’s delivery. We all had the breakfast together and were getting to know each other.
As we were eating together, it reminded me about the lunch we used to have at my work place with the colleagues. I should first start with how I got my first job. After finishing MCA most of my classmates got good opportunities but I was struggling even to do the Project for last semester. Like I said earlier since most of them were from BSc Computer science background doing project was nothing new. They all did a real time project in different companies and also got job the same one after completing MCA. I somehow managed to do a simple project Payroll System on my own in C programming language. After completing MCA, I went for a lot of interviews and failed. Main reason was the English speaking skills. Though I learned English by the time I finished BSc I wasn’t good enough with the spoken language, I was stammering a lot, searching for words and speaking broken English. That was one major bottleneck for me to clear the interviews. I got a job after almost a year in a small company in T.Nagar. This company was into Share Market brokerage and had some applications in Visual Basic. That’s the place I started learning VB. But again to come to work place it used to take 2 to 3 hours. I slogged like a dog learning and working. By 1 year I was good in enough in VB and I became one of the key developers in the team. Share market was so sensitive and some of the applications we developed used to generate reports every minute, every second. Our application became the TV for stock brokers. I was very happy about it since I was occupied and was glad that I was in a job. This part of my life was called “Slogging”
Four years passed, didn’t even know how time flied. Work got so tight that at one point was working 14 hours a day and never had rest on the weekends as well. I got a bit sick with same monotonous work and wanted a change very badly. When I started to think about new job, the fear of facing interview scared me. After so many years the only thing I was good at is the application we developed. I was a master in it but my English was still the same and didn’t improve it a bit. My Boss was not leaving me and on one day a discussion led to a hot argument and I told him upfront I’m quitting the company. I didn’t wait for his answer but just told him and left the place. I didn’t inform anyone at home that I left the job, I was afraid to say. So I was packing lunch and starting from home as usual but didn’t go to the office, instead was roaming around Chennai city. I thought of making use of this time to prepare technically for the interviews. Most of the time I spent in Panagal Park, reading notes, having lunch there, sleeping for few hours, reading again and then back to home. I tried attending couple of interviews but failed in all of them ☹. For some of the questions, I didn’t understand what they actually expected and for some questions even though I knew the answers, I couldn’t explain it clearly. I was back to the park and continued the preparation.
It was even more painful when I reached out to couple of my MCA friends asking them for openings. I sent email to many of them and no one replied back. Then I thought of calling them or meeting them personally. Nanda was the immediate choice since we both used to travel together in the train everyday from home to college. He was working as a project lead in a reputed company and his office was close to mine in T-Nagar. I went to his office and called him. He didn’t pick the phone. I tried this for couple of days. Finally he picked up one day but said that he is busy, and asked if there was anything urgent. I said “Nothing urgent da, but I just lost my job and looking for some other”. He said he will call me later in the evening, but he didn’t. I felt bad to call again & again so left it like that. As I was walking back to the park, it reminded me about one of the college days when he purposely didn’t take ticket in the train. Our bad time when we got down, the Ticket checking inspector asked for tickets and he started running away. But then was caught by some constables and they started inquiring us for a long time. I explained to them that he is not such a guy and just forgot to take ticket. I knew they were expecting some money and so I just took all the money I had, from purse, from bag, all the rupees and even the coins. Whatever I had, I just took everything and put it on the table and said “Sir, please we wont do like this after. Help us”. They took the money and left us. Nanda was in tears, hugged me n said “Thanks da, I will not forget this help. If father knows about it, I’m screwed”. I said its ok da, after all you are my friend and you don’t have to thank me.
I tried calling Prem, and he did pick up. We decided to meet up for lunch in one of the restaurant in Adayar. I used to give my salary to my father and get money from him only for travel to bus and train. So I had to think about spending money for everything. I took a bus to Adayar, waited for him in the restaurant. He came after 30 mins and we started eating. I explained him my situation that I left the current job and looking for a new one. He scolded me for quitting before I had an offer in hand. I told him how much I was frustrated. His company was into Software testing and he was a Sr Test Engineer. He said that there were no openings at that time but will let me know. Later he was inquiring me for a fresher opening in my company for his brother who just graduated. I said I can refer him, no issues. He just had food quickly and then started soon since he had some meeting. He didn’t even pay for the lunch so I had to pay it. Normally I would bring lunch or would have had at a cheaper place but since he called I came to his place. I spent about 300 for both of us which is one week expense for me. I did refer his brother through one of my colleague but he never called me after that. After few weeks I happen to see the classifieds and was surprised to see there were openings in his company. I felt very bad that he didn’t let me know and was still guessing why he did so.
Raja broke his arm while playing cricket for the college team. We had our practical exams and he had lot of pending assignments to be completed. He actually skipped the practical’s giving the game as excuse. After he got injured he couldn’t represent the college team and so he had no excuse other than to complete the assignments. He asked me if I could help him and without any hesitation I wrote all the assignments for him. It took 4 days totally to write all of them. I thought he would definitely help me and reached to him. He was exactly travelling to US that time and called me for a treat. It was in the treat I met my colleague who told me that he has joined Raja’s company with his help. He was also asking if Raja didn’t help me. Raja knew I was jobless but I didn’t tell him in detail. When he helped my colleague I was disappointed that he didn’t even care about me.
Saravanan shifted his career and he was into some real estate business. Obviously I could not go to him since he was not in IT. He was from my same caste and so very close to my family. During the same time, I heard he was going to get married. He was coming to our hometown for inviting and I was expecting him. But he didn’t invite us, I was shocked, surprised and disappointed.
These interview failures and all friends ditching me made my morale down and I started to feel very pathetic about myself. This continued for around 45 days. “This part of my life is called worst part of my life”
Our 5 hours wait time was over and we boarded the Flight to London. This time I did watch couple of movies. Slept for couple of hours and also went to my imagination world.
I didn’t know why my friends didn’t help me and I didn’t even wanted to know but of course I was disappointed. When I helped them, I never expected them to do a favor in back but when I was really in need of them, not a single one was helping me nor even guiding me. I couldn’t hide the fact that I left the job at home for more than a month since I had to give the salary. Surprisingly my father didn’t scold me and he asked me to keep trying without loosing hope. That gave me a confidence and started to read on spoken English. My father also asked me to join some English speaking course. It was a coincidence that one of the astrologers said to my mom that my time was bad and it would be fine after 45 days. Exactly after 45 days, my boss called me again apologized and said that I can work until I get some other job. It was too hard for me when such a person apologized to me. And moreover since he didn’t stop me from looking out, I went back to the same company. I had to shift from Walajabad to a small room in Chennai along with few colleagues. I continued another 3 years in the same company.
The transit from London was short and we boarded the flight to NY. This time I fully slept and was damn tired. I didn’t eat, didn’t watch movie but just laid asleep in my seat. It was just before the landing that I got up. I was eagerly waiting to step my foot into US. Before that you should know about the last leg of how I got this chance.
After my marriage, my wife posted my resume in different companies. It was through one of such email that I got an offer in “Fourthware Technology Solutions”. I managed to clear the technical round with my improved English. It was a bigger challenge in terms of handling international clients. This helped me a lot in improving my fluency. After a year, I got an opportunity to travel for a Business Requirement Study for one of the application. Yes finally my dream was going to be fulfilled….
Washington!!! Here I come …
This part of my life is called “Pursuit of HappYness”
